Fremantlebiz - Paul's Letter from Australia

A Singapore sling off

I haven't mentioned Nguyen Tuong Van before, but on 24 August I did mention some other Vietnamese/Australians who are now awaiting execution in foreign prisons because of heroin smuggling.

Twenty five year old Nguyen Tuong Van is on death row in Changi Prison. The place has a special niche in Australian history because many Australian prisoners of war found themselves there after the Japanese captured Singapore.

It's undiplomatic these days to discuss the collaboration of Asian Singaporians with the Japanese during the rest of the war, but it must have been a hell of a disappointment when their Japanese saviours lost.

I think many of the old era Changi Prison buildings have gone now. Replaced by a more modern and cleaner facility. Nearby is Changi International Airport, reportedly a wondrous shopping city which 24 hours a day supplies the needs of millions international travellers who briefly pause in transit on their way to somewhere else. It too is very clean - kept so by a veritable army of obedient cleaners.

Most visitors would be unaware that beneath the main runway are the countless remains of Chinese war prisoners murdered by the Japanese. If there is one thing you can't do in Singapore, besides smuggling heroin and having long hair, it's to stand in the way of progress, or in this case, to be buried in the way of progress.

Singapore has long had a draconian law banning chewing gum too. As a result they have very clean footpaths, but rampant gum disease. (Only joking about the latter.) However most citizens are so clean in body and soul they don't need to wear underwear or wash their hands after you know what.

But I remember another law when I rode in on my motorbike from Malaysia in about 1970. Long hair on westerners was on top of their agenda then. Anything resembling a Beetles' style haircut spelled big trouble, so being a law abiding chicken-heart, I made sure mine was short enough to avoid the attention of the hair censors.

It seems probable that lying in his cell watching sanitised programs on TV Nguyen Tuong Van hears the sound of passenger airliners taking off and landing, and will certainly wish he was leaving on one of them. He will soon. His execution is apparently imminent. He can go home to Melbourne - no worries - in a box.

Being a clean peoples, the Singaporians have chosen a clean method of execution - hanging. They learned this from the British. They did cling onto a few British traditions from the past when they were being taught to be civilised members of the British Empire. Another is the Singapore Sling, not a noose of rope to hang people, but a refreshing drink served at the famous Raffles Hotel.

The good thing about hanging is that its not usually messy, provided the correct weight table has been consulted. There shouldn't be too much trouble, because Amnesty International reckons that the Singaporians practised on more than 400 people between 1991 and 2003. This is Guiness Book of Records stuff. The highest rate in the world on a per capita basis. Congratulations! George W. Bush might be seething with envy, because he is reported to have been the execution king when he was Governor of Texas, or wherever it was.

Nguyen Tuong Van has plenty of apologists. If we are to believe them, he was a good heroin smuggler. That's good as in Jesus, Buddha and the Daily Llama. He had never been convicted of any previous crime.

Unfortunately there is no doubt about his guilt with this one. He confessed without even having to be tortured. Well there was almost half a kilo found strapped to his body. The reason he gave for wanting to smuggle heroin was to assist his twin brother in Australia. He'd found himself in a spot of bother with an expensive legal bill of $25,000. Expensive? From what I hear about lawyers, that's pretty cheap.

I am inclined to think that if this is the true reason Nguyen Tuong Van did what he did, given his claimed exemplary background, it would have been quite easy for him to legally raise $25,000 in Australia. There is any number of financial companies eager to provide credit cards to honest people.

Interestingly, none of the apologists seem to mention the victims whom heroin smugglers prey upon with their unconscionable trade.

There have been two interesting dialogues in The Australian which will still be on the newspaper's website.

One was by Philip Adams yesterday. It was titled. "By our silence, we all stand condemned." Mr Adams reckoned that because Nguyen Tuong Van was a male with a Vietnamese background, the majority of Australian peoples and the Australian government are ambivalent racists. Otherwise they'd be clamouring to save him. The article has generated a flurry of reactive letters today. The loquacious Mr Adams will enjoy that.

The other report is titled, "Macabre Legacy" by Nick Cater. It appeared in the paper today and goes into grisly mechanical detail about the fate which confronts the heroin smuggler. Nguyen Tuong Van's family shouldn't read this article, but those in favour of capital punishment will enjoy it. According to Mr Cater, sunrise on Friday mornings is the favoured time for executions in Singapore. The island nation's President Nathan refused an appeal for clemency last Friday, so the Melbourne man has almost certainly had his chips. It appears he will go to the gallows very soon.

He will be allowed chips too. Its the policy of the Singapore authorities to allow the condemned a choice of their last meal, naturally within budgetary constraints. No elephant's testicles on toast sort of stuff, but apparently they can order things like KFC, Pizza and Big Macs, with fries of course.

© MMV Paul R. Weaver.

About the writer

Check out each month's subject index on the Calendar Page for my "common-man" monologues about survival in 21st century Australia – plus a little history occasionally. An original essay is added most days.

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